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Things Girls Should Know About Guys
1. If you think you're chubby, you definitely are. Don't ask us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: why don't you put it down.
3. No need to cut your hair. EVER
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not pursuits to check if he can buy the just right present, again! We're not seeing anything special we buy for you. It's just another thing displayed in the showcase.
5. If you ask a query you don't wish an answer to, look forward to an answer you don't want to hear.
6. At times, he's not thinking about you. Be patient.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are ready to talk about such subjects as the shotgun configuration and huge trucks.
8. Throw out your cat. Yes, it's not different; it's just like any other cat walking down the lane.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats.
10. Sunday = Sports. Forget I'm your husband even.
11. Shopping is not a sport.
12. Anything you wear is just ok. Really dressing never matters to guys unless it is too revealing.
13. You have enough dresses.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Don't blackmail me by crying out loud. Use it if you cant live without, but don't suppose us to like it.
16. Ask for what you need not what you WANT. Slight hints don't work.
17. No, he doesn't remember what day it is. He never will. Highlight anniversaries on a calendar. No need to get angry on a belated birthday wish.
18. Nearly all boys have two or three pairs of shoes - how you suppose we can decide which one out of your thirty shoes will look good with your dress.
19. Yes and No are two straight answers to almost any question asked.
20. A nuisance that lasts for 17 months is a disease. See a doctor.
21. Foreign movies are best left to foreigners.
22. Don't make us 50 rules when 25 will work just that fine.
23. No faking please. We'd rather be idle and ineffective than misled.
24. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.
25. 30. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is unacceptable in an argument. All statements become invalid after one week.
26. Because you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, so don't suppose us to behave like soap opera boys.
27. If something we said can be construed two ways, and one of the ways makes you depressing and annoyed, we meant the other one.
28. Let us stare at girls. If we don't stare other girls, how can we know how attractive you are?
29. You can either inquire us to do something OR dictate us how you like it to be done -- not both.
30. Whenever feasible, please say whatever you want during commercials.
31. Christopher Columbus didn't require commands to discover America, and neither do we.
32. Consider riding, golf and hunting a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just as you do.
33. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first 6 weeks we met.
AND FINALLY, THE NUMBER ONE RULE:
Don't waste your time to look too much pretty, you seem only as prettier as we first met. We're not going to judge you ever again with those eyes.
The End - Things Girls Should Know About Guys
17. No, he doesn't remember what day it is. He never will. Highlight anniversaries on a calendar. No need to get angry on a belated birthday wish.
18. Nearly all boys have two or three pairs of shoes - how you suppose we can decide which one out of your thirty shoes will look good with your dress.
19. Yes and No are two straight answers to almost any question asked.
20. A nuisance that lasts for 17 months is a disease. See a doctor.
21. Foreign movies are best left to foreigners.
22. Don't make us 50 rules when 25 will work just that fine.
23. No faking please. We'd rather be idle and ineffective than misled.
24. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together.
25. 30. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is unacceptable in an argument. All statements become invalid after one week.
26. Because you don't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, so don't suppose us to behave like soap opera boys.
27. If something we said can be construed two ways, and one of the ways makes you depressing and annoyed, we meant the other one.
28. Let us stare at girls. If we don't stare other girls, how can we know how attractive you are?
29. You can either inquire us to do something OR dictate us how you like it to be done -- not both.
30. Whenever feasible, please say whatever you want during commercials.
31. Christopher Columbus didn't require commands to discover America, and neither do we.
32. Consider riding, golf and hunting a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just as you do.
33. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first 6 weeks we met.
AND FINALLY, THE NUMBER ONE RULE:
Don't waste your time to look too much pretty, you seem only as prettier as we first met. We're not going to judge you ever again with those eyes.
The End - Things Girls Should Know About Guys